Definition: Pity Invite

22 04 2008

A pity invite, by my definition and usage, is an invitation to a party or event, usually given because the receiver of the pity invite found out about the party or event. The host originally didn’t plan to invite pity invite receivers, but because they have found it, it would seem rude NOT to invite them, and thus, a pity invite is given out.

It is considered a faux pas to actually respond affirmatively to a pity invite, as you are not actually wanted at this party or event. If you suspect you have received a pity invite, check with other confirmed guests when they received theirs. If the time difference between their invites and yours seems a little too big to be accidental, you have probably received a pity invite. The best course of action in this case is to politely decline, preferably by saying you have other plans already, even if you don’t.

Here’s a case study: Say Bob is throwing a party, and invites Sarah, Jessica, Steve, Peter, Joshua, Susan and Bradley, but leaves out Sheldon because he doesn’t like Sheldon. However, if Sheldon believes he should have been invited, and somehow finds out (say, from talking to Susan), that Bob is having a party, and casually mentions to Bob about the party, and Bob presents him with a invite: that would be a pity invite. Demonstrating the correct procedure, Sheldon declines the invite by saying he has to attend his cousin’s drug intervention. Thus, Bob’s party is a success because Sheldon isn’t there, and Sheldon has avoided the awkwardness of attending a party in which he is not welcome.

In short, any invite given by asking to be invited or hinting to be invited, when others have already been invited before you.




4 responses

22 04 2008

haha you lucky. I actually understood that!! LOL so you got any pity invites? And we need to lure in more readers. Like where are your university friends?

18 05 2008

Ok I so understand now… From now on I will invite you ahead of time!!!!

8 07 2008

LOL, love the “drug intervention” excuse. But, doesn’t it count if you were invited along with all the others, but know for a fact that the host didn’t actually like you?

PS: you should consider publishing all these definitions of yours

17 04 2013

What’s up, everything is going perfectly here and ofcourse every one is sharing information, that’s actually fine, keep up writing.

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